Do you remember the last line they always say in fairy tales… “and they live happily ever after…”?
I love that line and I’ve taken a personal mantra from it. Except that the story of my life is a consistent conscious effort of maintaining a happy life. Yes, I said conscious effort because you don’t just become happy by accident or by luck.
To live a happy life, you make conscious decisions about choosing happiness over tons of negative emotions – depression, sadness, frustrations, insecurities, hopelessness, are just some of them and there are plenty more.
When was the last time you feel depressed or sad or lonely for some reason?
It’s so easy to fall into the trap of negative emotions. But the key is not to feed them. You don’t want it to become a hideous monster, do you?
Instead, make a conscious effort to ward it off and choose happiness every single time. You might say it’s so easy to say but actually hard to apply in real life. I’d say with constant practice, you’ll get there.
Here are some points that I practice everyday and which I hope can also help you live a happier life.
1. Don’t stress out over small things
Or in other words, don’t magnify your frustrations. There are many instances in our lives that are beyond our control. Things didn’t happen the way we wanted or planned. It’s frustrating, yes. Annoying, true.
If they only happened as planned, it would be easier. Definitely, true!
But things don’t always happen as planned and you certainly don’t have the power to see the future. So don’t be frustrated about the little things. Sure, there are inevitable hiccups along the way and that’s fine. Everything has a solution and you can always do better next time.
If there are some other people involved, don’t play the blame game. Most of the time, all parties involved have their own shortcomings. Communicate what you could have all done better, learn from your mistakes and move on.
2. Get away from toxic people
Everyone has their own drama in life. For some, the drama is what spices up life. But to some extent, too much drama is annoying – at least for me.
I’ve had some close people in my life who leads a very exciting life, a.k.a. dramatic life. The drama follows them everywhere. Or maybe they search for drama, I really can’t tell the difference.
At first, I was patiently listening and offering solutions when asked. Because I believe that issues are meant to be solved and not just for a pity party. Sometimes, they listen and most of the time they don’t and that’s fine. Everyone has the right to lead a life how they wanted.
But when it becomes a vicious cycle with their issues not going away and all they talk about is life being unfair and sad, then you have to be wise and think if this is the company that you want to invite in your life.
There’s a saying, “One who walks with wise men grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm”.
As I grow older, I’ve learned the importance of choosing wisely the people I spend time with. I choose those who inspire and encourage me to lead a bright, happy and successful life. They are those who even when faced with failures are choosing to be strong and are getting up to face life; always choosing to have a positive outlook despite the odds.
Sure, failures and frustrations are part of life. But when you face one, don’t be consumed by it. Instead, use it as a leverage to stand up stronger and wiser.
3. Be a big ball of positive energy
Give back your positive energy to the people around you. If you have the power to change a person’s day, choose to give the positive impact.
Sometimes, all it takes is simple greetings or few words of encouragement to make a person’s day. A simple thank you or a smile would suffice too.
Be that person that the people around you would like to see more of because you make their life brighter.
But what if that other person did something wrong to really hurt your feelings?
Be a real grown-up and communicate. You don’t have to yell to get your point across. Unless the other person is being really close-minded, he will for sure understand your sentiments. Otherwise, it might be better to let it go. Remember, karma is a bitch and it’s digital these days.
There are things you can’t control but you can always control how you handle the situation. Rise above your emotions and people will respect you even more.
4. Be thankful. Always.
It’s so easy to be thankful when you’re happy and everything is falling into their right places. But can you still be thankful when life is difficult?
No matter at which point you are in the ups and downs of life, make sure that you are thankful for the littlest blessings of life.
Whenever I’m at my lowest points, I always think that things do happen for a reason and we have to experience such instances to make us stronger and more capable of accomplishing greater things. I see challenges and failures as blessings in disguise.
So be thankful when life is great more so when it’s challenging.
5. Don’t live a life fearing people’s judgment
As long as you’re not hurting anyone or stepping on someone’s toes along the way, I’d say live a life that is yours. But I must add, know your boundaries and keep your morals intact then you’re good to go.
People would always hold an opinion about everything, whether good or bad. They are helpful when they are constructive criticisms. I actually love hearing constructive criticisms because it helps me see and consider the things I don’t see from my perspective and gives me the opportunity to improve myself.
However, if they are nonsensical which obviously don’t have a basis and are only thrown to attack you and make you feel bad, it’s better not to pay any attention at all.
6. Leave your insecurities behind
Insecurities are common and each one has a set of their own. However, you must never ever project your own insecurities to other people by criticizing them. It doesn’t do anyone good.
See other people’s success as an inspiration. Be happy for their accomplishments.
Then look in the mirror – there you will find your real competition.
Focus on how else you can improve your own life and become a better version of yourself than yesterday, every single day. When you focus on your life and in doing what truly makes you happy, you will become your own winner!
7. Find your true happiness
Find that thing that always makes you happy doing. Not because other people are happy doing it and is supposed to make you feel the same way too. But ‘that thing’ that lifts your mood and takes you to a happy and peaceful place. It could be writing, swimming, painting, reading, traveling, etc.
Search for it and when you know what it is, do more of that. You’ll never know where it will lead you.
At first glance, life seems so complicated with so many surrounding elements. But when you practice focusing inward, thinking of how you can make yourself better for your own good and for the people who matter in your life and diverting your attention only to the good things, you will for sure find yourself in a happy and content spot amidst the turmoil.
I hope that you find this article helpful and if you do, don’t forget to share it with the people you care about. Here’s wishing you a happy ever after! Until next time!